As females/males, our sexual energy is our life energy, putting color and passion into everything that we do, create, and be. The problem is that over the years we have developed so many layers of protection that keep us from feeling fully alive and connected with our bodies and sexuality. We are told from an early age to “cover up”, “girls don’t do that”, “girls don’t say that”, “don’t wear that”, and on and on. And it’s the same with little boys, “don’t touch that”, “don’t play with your penis”, and the worst one of all “you’ll go blind if you masturbate”. It’s ludicrous really!
Well, what if I told you that you don’t have to listen to all of that negativity? What if I told you, that we as women and as men should learn how to explore our bodies and our sexuality? If you’ve ever been told it was wrong to masturbate or to watch/look at pornography, you need to realize that it is NOT wrong. Those are just things people say when they don’t have any self-love, and they want you to stay in your “good girl/boy” box! Now, I’m not saying that some people can’t form an addiction to pornography; we’re not talking about that extreme here.
I want to talk about how we can live a happy and healthy sex life without feeling like it’s dirty or that some fetish you like is “weird”. I have always said that there is a fetish for everyone, and if you think about it for a moment, you’ll discover that one thing that you’ve always wanted to do or try that might be considered “taboo” or “disgusting” (of course I’m only talking about these things with a willing adult partner). No one has the right to stifle your sexuality, it is yours to discover.
Here are a couple ways to awaken your sex goddess/god within yourself:
The first step is to be comfortable with your body. Don’t look at yourself in a bad light, meaning; forget those stereotypes of how your body should look. Big, little, short, tall, thin or heavy, it is your body and your temple. Worship yourself, tell yourself that you are beautiful, that you are worthy of love and satisfaction. I’ve heard so many men and women complain about their size, there is always someone that will love every curve, dimple or mark on your body. And let us not forget that thin women and men are also very self-conscious, so don’t think it’s just overweight people. So, get naked, sit in front of a mirror and look at your body; your face, your hair, your skin, your nails, your genitals. Explore every fold, curve and dimple. This is your body; love it for what it is.
Five affirmations that you can practice:
- I am a Goddess/God and I love what and who I see in the mirror.
- I am a Goddess/God and I stand in complete satisfaction of who I am and what I look like.
- I am a Goddess/God and I believe in my unique gifts and abilities.
- I am a Goddess/God and I deserve respect, love, validation and kindness.
- I am a Goddess/God and I feel happy, fulfilled, sexy and powerful
The next step is to give in to your sexual desires. Have you ever wanted to have sex with more than one partner or with a same sex partner? Why not give in to those desires as long as it benefits all willing participants? If you are in a monogamist relationship, I’m not saying to go cheat on your partner, but why not talk about it with him/her. If it’s mutually satisfying for everyone then have at it. Desires and fantasies can come to fruition if you want them bad enough. All of the sexual experiences that I’ve had have come when I least expected it. An example of one such encounter; I was sitting at a bar with a man I had talked to online for a long time, it was our first meeting face to face, we had a few drinks but were nowhere intoxicated. We were getting friendly and making out a bit at a side table. Another man walked over and started a conversation with us; he ended up sitting down and stayed. We were all getting very acquainted by closing time and decided to go back to his house for a drink, which was close by. I won’t go into detail of what happened, but we ended up having mind-blowing very satisfying sex. Sure, I was a little apprehensive at first, but I had always fantasized about and it felt really good to let go of all the restraints that society has put on us. I awakened my inner Goddess that night and it was so freeing and absolutely life changing.
Have you ever wondered who made up the word slut or whore? I believe it was men and women who were not enlightened or even comfortable in their own skin. There are so many stereotypes about women and men, it’s utterly frustrating. I have had females friends ask me why I am so comfortable with talking about sex, and all I can say is that my Momma was a down to earth, very opened minded woman who was very open about sexuality. I never feared going to her with questions or concerns, and I was in turn the same way with my sons. I think if you want to be satisfied with your life, you have to rethink what you’ve been told as a child. Back then we were all wide-eyed children who looked at our world with wonder and fascination. We believed in magic and unicorns, but then closed minded adults told us that those things didn’t exist. We need to get back to that feeling, it’s our nature as magical creatures, let go of that way of thinking. Become who you were meant to be and don’t surrender to what society wanted you to be. Be weird, be creative, and be wide-eyed again. Be the Goddess/God that you want to be!
If after reading this, you feel that you need to add this positive way of thinking into your life, but you need some additional advice, I am here for you all. I would love to answer any questions you may have regarding this post.